"THE CORRECT GRAMMAR THREAD"

[IROLLDOLO]

So, I'm all about that correct grammar steez, but there are a few things that have always bothered me . . .

Is it a,b, and c (that's what I was taught in school) or is it a, b and c?

And then there's this guy: —

People always want to put it in there with no spaces before and after, but I feel like this is not aesthetically pleasing and doesn't really make sense to me. Who is wrong and who is right?

I also feel like I should use more semi-colons in my writing.

It seems like texting (read sexting) and shit like that has really caused people to start slipping on their English game. Fuck all that noise!

[rev. the mike]

Them Oxford commas, be matters of personal preference;

[rev. the mike]

So, I'm all about that correct grammar steez, but there's a few things that have always bothered me . . .


There are a few things...

[chrisbreezyyy]

i hate when people don't use correct grammar, it's like their four year old or somethin

[IROLLDOLO]

http://images2.memegenerator.net/ImageMacro/5565609/WHY-DO-YOU-EDIT-MY-POST-TO-MAKE-IT-LOOK-LIKE-I-HAVE-BAD-GRAMMAR.jpg?imageSize=Medium&generatorName=y-u-no-cry

;)

[Alex Coe]

Grammer*

[IROLLDOLO]

I think what is even worse than people who just fuck it all up completely is people who use perfect (or almost perfect) grammar but don't capitalize any words. Like, what the fuck, doggy? Is your shift button broken or some shit?!

[s.]

Punctuation is not grammar.

[IROLLDOLO]

You know what else fucks me up?

Charlie said,"Fuck you!"

I feel like there should be a space between the , and the ".

[IROLLDOLO]

Fuck me, you are right, Sadi.

http://matchstic.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2009/07/the_more_you_know1.jpg

[rev. the mike]

http://images2.memegenerator.net/ImageMacro/5565609/WHY-DO-YOU-EDIT-MY-POST-TO-MAKE-IT-LOOK-LIKE-I-HAVE-BAD-GRAMMAR.jpg?imageSize=Medium&generatorName=y-u-no-cry

;)

I did not edit your post.

[IROLLDOLO]

;) ;) ;)

[s.]

You know what else fucks me up?

Charlie said,"Fuck you!"

I feel like there should be a space between the , and the ".
I thought it was a known rule that you add a space after a coma (or a dot). And about dash, I do the same- space only after.

I think what is even worse than people who just fuck it all up completely is people who use perfect (or almost perfect) grammar but don't capitalize any words. Like, what the fuck, doggy? Is your shift button broken or some shit?!

I'm guilty of this, sometimes I'll capitalise words and sometimes not :oops:

[ift]

Is it a, b, and c (that's what I was taught in school) or is it a, b and c?

I was taught that both are acceptable, but I edited in a space between the 'a,' and 'b,'.



Grammer*

:roll:

[bobgross]

I don't understand how people's grammar can be so terrible, especially when the majority of offenders are native English speakers. You don't even need to know proper grammar. Generally, if it sounds right to a native speaker, it is right. And the problems with their, there, and they're are disturbing and worrying.

[CRF]

their, there, and they're

The only grammar rule that judges your intelligence from one single sentence.

[IROLLDOLO]

Honestly, Bob, I take people more seriously when they know how to write correctly. This is a forum and our means of communication is through the English language. In my opinion, improper English automatically discredits whatever it is that the author is saying. This is especially disappointing when it seems like the author has put a lot of effort into the response and the response actually has some substance (Gatsby and Tim Adams).

[CRF]

Gatsby and Tim Adams
It's a good idea to call out other be-magger's, right?

[IROLLDOLO]

Fuck ya. Chimbuktu does the same shit. They all have some really interesting perspectives and they are obviously smart dudes, but the no-caps-type-shit just kills it for me. It's not like they are going to go cry or something because I feel this way. They probably think I'm an obsessive-compulsive nerd for even noticing or caring.

[Flandangle]

Your and you're.

Grrrrrrrrr

[s.]

I don't understand how people's grammar can be so terrible, especially when the majority of offenders are native English speakers. You don't even need to know proper grammar. Generally, if it sounds right to a native speaker, it is right. And the problems with their, there, and they're are disturbing and worrying.

I've noticed that once my English got good enough, some stupid mistakes started to happen from time to time. Especially when I was tired and typing really fast. The kind of "Zim mistakes"- typing "wright" instead of "right" and so. I'd say if English is your native language, you aren't as careful when using it. So those mistakes can happen, but if they are happening all the time- step your game up.

[bobgross]

I don't mind punctuation mistakes or misusing semicolons or anything. Generally, if the person spells common words correctly and conveys their ideas clearly, I'm good. If Tim Adams uses their instead of they're, it's probably because he just wanted to get his ideas down quickly. A few mistakes in a wall of otherwise fine text is not a big deal to me.

I do understand the 'increased respect' though.

[RobFromFlint]

The only grammar rule that judges your intelligence from one single sentence.

were, wear, where, we're

[IROLLDOLO]

I did not say anything about "increased respect"; I used the words "take more seriously".

(Did I use that semi-colon right, guys?)

[ift]

Yes, but you didn't use either of your ""s with the correct punctuation ;)

[s.]

I think you did, here's some practice ;)
http://theoatmeal.com/comics/semicolon


Also relevant to this thread:
http://theoatmeal.com/comics/apostrophe
http://theoatmeal.com/comics/misspelling

[ift]

Quotations have stupid rules though. I think the semicolon actually should have been within the quotation, and I've never been down with those rules.

[IROLLDOLO]

Yes, but you didn't use either of your ""s with the correct punctuation ;)

But, I didn't use the word said (or the like) so I don't have to have a comma, or so I thought.

[IROLLDOLO]

I've always dug your use of the English language, Dr. Copp.

http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_zgR5l7u4J5A/TGHyFsJyPeI/AAAAAAAAAFw/bnjLczMIOxc/S150/500px-Grammar_Nazi_Icon_Text_Bcg.svg%5B1%5D.png

[ift]

Well I'll be damned. I just learned a lot.

http://grammar.ccc.commnet.edu/grammar/marks/quotation.htm

[ift]

Dr. Copp.

^ my grandpa's name.

[salomonskater]

I hate when people don't make an effort to write correctly. And what I hate even more is when people write correctly for their school works, but don't do it on the internet because it's "not important": this is just plain retarded.

[R-MONEY$$$]

I like putting question marks at the end of statements?

It makes you think.

[ift]

I hate when people don't make an effort to write correctly. And what I hate even more is when people write correctly for their school works, but don't do it on the internet because it's "not important": this is just mega ridiculous..

[bobgross]

I did not say anything about "increased respect"; I used the words "take more seriously".

(Did I use that semi-colon right, guys?)

oh
well...
"Take more seriously" then.

[bostonsk8er]

Proper grammar is often lost due to specific local dialects.
American English is especially brutal, as it is a severe corruption of the language it originated from.

[CRF]

were, wear, where, we're

Touche.

[Mudhut Jollyrancher]

i dont give a fuck

[s.]

rofl

[Alex Coe]

I find it a funny thing that anyone would be so committed to, irritated by misuse of, or nazi about english grammar. First, there's no reason why grammar is the way it is. There are plenty of words we commonly use that are ambiguous, like live (to be living) and live (as in a live concert) that we don't create rules for distinguishing. But since there is a rule about your and you're some people have become adamant about following it, even in sentences where the use is clear either way. So instead of following a grammar rule because it enhances communication its become a tool to inflate one's ego, it seems.

[Ozzie Sandoval]

i like how everyone in here is trying to type all correct and shit fuck that jazz run on sentence no capitals and poor word choice just to fuck with all yas you cant tell my how to type I TyPez As I WaNnA ItS tHiS iS mY FaVoRiTe WaYz 2 tYpE

[Monday]

So, I'm all about that correct grammar steez, but there are a few things that have always bothered me . . .

Start by getting rid of this. It is either this ... or …



Is it a,b, and c (that's what I was taught in school) or is it a, b and c?

The first one gives me headaches. I always wonder why people do this.



And then there's this guy: —

People always want to put it in there with no spaces before and after, but I feel like this is not aesthetically pleasing and doesn't really make sense to me. Who is wrong and who is right?

Needs spaces before and after.



I also feel like I should use more semi-colons in my writing.

Probably...



It seems like texting (read sexting) and shit like that has really caused people to start slipping on their English game. Fuck all that noise!

It sometimes bugs me when I get e-mails from people and they use two spaces between sentences. Like they wrote this mail on a typewriter or something...? I sometimes can’t believe this still gets taught in American schools.

I also find it weird to read Freddy’s post, because he puts spaces between the end of the text and the period, question mark, whatever... I know that is common sense in France but where I live it’s a no-go.

I also hate it when I come across posts where people try to bring their point across by using multiple characters at the end!!!!

[tim_adams]

This is especially disappointing when it seems like the author has put a lot of effort into the response and the response actually has some substance (Gatsby and Tim Adams).

If Tim Adams uses their instead of they're, it's probably because he just wanted to get his ideas down quickly. A few mistakes in a wall of otherwise fine text is not a big deal to me.

I do understand the 'increased respect' though.
Ummm... I would actually challenge you guys to find ANY post I've ever made with substantial (or any) grammatical errors. Next time it happens, please point it out, and I'll explain why you're wrong. ;)

[IROLLDOLO]

Thanks for not taking that the wrong way, Tim. I certainly have a lot of respect for you and your point of view.

[tim_adams]

That was more in response to Bob than you. I'm a closeted grammar nazi myself.

[Apsley Cherry-Garrard]

bachelor's in english.
3 months away from earning my CA teaching credential for english. another semester from a M.Ed.
and...

DGAF about typing on the internet. seriously, if you saw the shit that high school (and most college) students turn in these days, you'd think that be-mag was grammar-wonderful. i care more about syntax than grammar and punctuation. i can get grammar/punctuation/syntax LOLZ out of almost any post i read on a forum or blog.




It sometimes bugs me when I get e-mails from people and they use two spaces between sentences. Like they wrote this mail on a typewriter or something...? I sometimes can’t believe this still gets taught in American schools.

i hate when people DON'T put two spaces.


Because it is increasingly common for papers and manuscripts to be prepared with a single space after all punctuation marks, this spacing is shown in the examples in the MLA Handbook and the MLA Style Manual. As a practical matter, however, there is nothing wrong with using two spaces after concluding punctuation marks unless an instructor or editor requests that you do otherwise.

http://www.mla.org/ <---answers to all questions

also, "A Writer's Reference" by Diana Hacker is the titz.

[Dr. Zaius]

bachelor's in english.


Capitalize English.

[Flandangle]

bachelor's in english.
3 months away from earning my CA teaching credential for english. another semester from a M.Ed.
and...

DGAF about typing on the internet. seriously, if you saw the shit that high school (and most college) students turn in these days, you'd think that be-mag was grammar-wonderful. i care more about syntax than grammar and punctuation. i can get grammar/punctuation/syntax LOLZ out of almost any post i read on a forum or blog.
i hate when people DON'T put two spaces.
http://www.mla.org/ <---answers to all questions
also, "A Writer's Reference" by Diana Hacker is the titz.

http://images2.memegenerator.net/ImageMacro/5579865/Bachelor-in-English-Y-U-No-capitalize-.jpg?imageSize=Medium&generatorName=Y-U-NO

[wujcik]

guy who got arrested for being stupid starts thread about grammar... :lol:

[IROLLDOLO]

i hate when people DON'T put two spaces.

I used to think this was proper until I learned that book editors have to go through and delete all of the author's second spaces.


guy who got arrested for being stupid starts thread about grammar... :lol:

I don't think you understand what I was arrested for.

[Monday]

The two spaces made sense "back in the dayz" when typewriters had mono spaced letters to them. That was just how they rolled back then. Easier to manufacture a typewriter when all the "stamps" had the same dimension. So to make the end of (and therefore the beginning of a new) sentence more obvious you put two spaces.

It is absolutely retarded to put two spaces nowadays because modern layout programs take care of this automatically. And of course all letters have individual spacing nowadays. Retarded I say.

[bobgross]

That was more in response to Bob than you. I'm a closeted grammar nazi myself.

I don't really read your wall-of-text posts, I only said your name because Charlie said you make grammatical mistakes, so I just assumed he was right.
What I said really applies to anyone, if you're in a heated debate and both sides are pumping out huge walls of text as quickly as they can, there's bound to be some mistakes. Probably not as obvious a mistake as switching they're and their, but you get the idea.

[bostonsk8er]

I don't really read your wall-of-text posts, I only said your name because Charlie said you make grammatical mistakes, so I just assumed he was right.
What I said really applies to anyone, if you're in a heated debate and both sides are pumping out huge walls of text as quickly as they can, there's bound to be some mistakes. Probably not as obvious a mistake as switching they're and their, but you get the idea.
Obviously never argued with a pissed off woman before. They magically become more clear and concise, with perfect grammar.
Scary shit.

[Keith Courage]

Grammatical errors, misspellings, and incorrect punctuation have always been a pet peeve of mine. Recently, however, I've run into something that aggravates (aggro skates) me much more and that is actually defending your lazy, poorly thought out posts, Facebook updates, etc. There is no defense for such idiotic actions. If you can navigate a website and figure out how to post pictures of your 26th birthday then you certainly have the mental capacity to figure out how place a fucking apostrophe.

Concerning periods, I just learned recently that you shouldn't place two spaces at the end of a sentence. It's a hard habit to break after 18 years of using a computer.

Lastly, internet speech (IE Lolz, teh, etc.) is much funnier and hits harder if your post is well written and punctuated at an adult level.

[randy lahey]

shut the fuck up. being anal about correct punctuation on an online messageboard is for faggots who want to appear to be well educated (but are most often overcompensating). if you actually do serious writing on a regular basis you would not give a shit about grammar and punctuation; everyone in the real world can write like an adult if they have to.

[Krish]

Obviously never argued with a pissed off woman before. They magically become more clear and concise, with perfect grammar.
Scary shit.

Unless she's black.

That's right I said it.

[IROLLDOLO]

. . . or fucking crazy.

[Muppet4Eternity]

Punctuation is not grammar.

Word, grammar is ordering words and making tenses/plurals etc agree. Punctuation is the correct use of capitals, full stops and others such as: colons, dashes, ellipsii and so forth.

[wujcik]

. . . or fucking crazy.

date crazy chick
chick decides that you aint not doin' it right
show up at chicks house wit gun to get pantz back
????
get arrested







no profit


























grammar rules sourced from chuck's previous posts

[IROLLDOLO]

Dude, that's not even remotely close to what happened. Get off my nuts.

[Muppet4Eternity]

bemag shud ban peopl hu talk always typ lyk tis

[CRF]

bemag shud ban peopl hu talk always typ lyk tis

Can we just ban you instead?

[Apsley Cherry-Garrard]

everyone in the real world can write like an adult if they have to.

dude, this is SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO not true.
i would bet money that 90+% of the adult population cannot write correctly. probably like 95%. its terrible. and in the under 18 age group, i bet 98% cannot write correctly.
americans are dumb as shit when it comes to writing, speaking, doing things, etc.

[Alex Coe]

Grammatical errors, misspellings, and incorrect punctuation have always been a pet peeve of mine. Recently, however, I've run into something that aggravates (aggro skates) me much more and that is actually defending your lazy, poorly thought out posts, Facebook updates, etc. There is no defense for such idiotic actions. If you can navigate a website and figure out how to post pictures of your 26th birthday then you certainly have the mental capacity to figure out how place a fucking apostrophe.

Concerning periods, I just learned recently that you shouldn't place two spaces at the end of a sentence. It's a hard habit to break after 18 years of using a computer.

Lastly, internet speech (IE Lolz, teh, etc.) is much funnier and hits harder if your post is well written and punctuated at an adult level.

My earlier post was a defense of that. I'll rephrase it in short for you. Language as a whole is a means of communication, not displaying intelligence, and means of communication are relative. Therefore, communication can take any for that two people find useful, breaking common grammatical, spelling, and punctual rules if desired.

This forces the hand of the writing nazis to let go of the reins and step off of the high horse. :mrgreen:

[Monday]

For Freddy: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Plenken